I can see dead people

12 piece bucket
I'm a self-admitted Mo-ron. I like to ask my buddies would you do X for $5 million. Or how much would it take for you to do X. Typically something vulgar, nasty, or that would make ya'mama blush.

I was asking my golf buddy (nameless to protect the innocent) as we're walking up to the 8th green.

BUCKET "If you could play golf anywhere anytime you wanted to would you wack somebody."

BUDDY "Hell yeah."

BUCKET "Would you kill your wife?"

BUDDY "Anywhere? Anytime? For Free?"

BUCKET "Yep."

BUDDY "She's dead."

BUCKET "What about your mom."

BUDDY . . . 5 second pregnant pause . . . "She's lived a full life. Yeah probably."

BUCKET "What about your brother?"

BUDDY "Nah. He helped me move some furniture last week. He can live."

Didn't have the set to ask him about his kid. Should have. . .

The moral of this story is ALWAYS help your friends move furniture if they ask.

This public service announcement has been brought to you by KFC and K&W Cafeteria.
jim_0068
He better be a close friend for me to move him, that's like...going all the way

(we'll see who picks up on that hidden reference)
12 piece bucket
Originally Posted by jim_0068 He better be a close friend for me to move him, that's like...going all the way

(we'll see who picks up on that hidden reference)
Holla! I'm with you. I ain't MOVING nobody. I'd help them move a desk or something. But an all day affair moving rooms and boxes. Not happenin'!
bambam
Originally Posted by 12 piece bucket Holla! I'm with you. I ain't MOVING nobody. I'd help them move a desk or something. But an all day affair moving rooms and boxes. Not happenin'!
what about for a round of golf?
Yoda
Originally Posted by 12 piece bucket
I ain't MOVING nobody. I'd help them move a desk or something. But an all day affair moving rooms and boxes. Not happenin'!
Moving day.

Not Saturday on the PGA TOUR.

But Moving Day in Real Time.

Your brother.

Your sister.

Your best friend.

How can you say no?

Simple!

Start with this...

"You know, I don't own a truck, so why don't you call [pick a name]..."

I keep at the ready a list of all family members and friends who do own a truck.

And it looks like I'm now home free...

At age 900 I no longer get the calls.

bambam
Originally Posted by Yoda ..."You know, I don't own a truck, so why don't you call [pick a name]..."
This is so true...I own a truck On the upside, there 'aint nobody not on my list next time we move
Fred Brattain
Friends help you move/.... REAL friends help you move the body

Obi WunPutt
EC
Originally Posted by jim_0068 He better be a close friend for me to move him, that's like...going all the way

(we'll see who picks up on that hidden reference)
Seinfeld & Hernandez...great episode!

EC
jim_0068
Originally Posted by EC Seinfeld & Hernandez...great episode!

EC
We have a winnnnnnnnnner!
alex_chung
I have helped a lot of people move over the years, so I think I am ok and not any list to be 'bumped' off
Besides I only own a small car and the boot has my golf stuff in it
Alex